Surrendering All

If I stop and try to think about how much God loves me...It hurts!

It hurts to know how many times I have let Him down yet, He has NEVER FAILED me.

I learned a LOT yesterday about surrender. From a personal experience and from a friend we shall call "Joe Bob."

First my story... You all know that something has been going on and I have been ever so elusive. You know it has to do with my job. What I realized yesterday is that it was really (from God's perspective) not about the job at all!

When Carys was diagnosed and I had to leave CCA, I had a difficult time letting go. I whined and complained to God that I knew that I was where He wanted me! I stomped my feet like a child and screamed WHY!! Eventually, I turned all of that over to God and He changed my attitude about it. I could see in retrospect, what He was doing. Of course, He had nothing but the BEST is store for me!

So then, he healed Carys! Praise the Lord I learned that when you surrender things to God, He really never fails you.

So one year later I find myself in a similar situation. A job question. "But God", I said, "I have already given up one job, are you really going to require another of me? Did I not presevere, did I not praise You, amd I not serving You?"

It is embarssing to say for about two months I let this debate cloud my life. Finally, over the past few days I prayed harder, read my Bible more, and most imporatnatly sought God's will and surrendered myself to Him.

The story is awesome, but I would have to leave out so many detailes that it would just confuse you so I will just tell you the result.

I had one last meeting. To see if everything was going to work out. There was just one person on earth who could deliver the news I needed for everything to workout. I called him, I emailed him...but I got no response.

So I sat in my car before the metting and told God this...

"I know you are about to do a mighty work. I am not sure what it is, but I am ready. This job is NOT my life's calling. YOU are my life's calling. You have called me, I will answer...lead me Lord I will go. If this job is in Your plan, I will seek out what it is, why it is you have put me here. If not, I accept with a whole heart that YOU are and Awesome God, You reign from heaven above with wisdom, power, and love and I have learned from my past mistakes...I will not doubt Your plan!"

So I go in. Waiting to hear from heaven. They decide it would be best to put me off another day. What! Another day! "Okay God, I said I would trust, I am trusting, I am trusting!" So I get up to leave, my phone vibrates, I think it is my friend texting me back cause I begged them to pray for me! I look down and it is an email....

FROM THE GUY, the ONE GUY who could end all of this.

The email confirmed exactly what I need to put all of this "work" stuff to rest! GOD MOVED!!

I was speech-less, breathless...
I could see God in heaven cheering. No, not becuase of the job stuff, but because I know He was setting there with this blessing in His hand, just waiting for me to surrender! Once I did, I opended the door for Him to do His Work.

Then there is my friend "Joe Bob." Here I am, all happy and proud of my surrender, when God uses "Job Bob" to show me just how little God requires of me. Look back to yesterday's post. "Job Bob" as far as I am concerned...goes on that list!

"Joe Bob" has been through a lot. But, he has never forgotten God's call.

You guys probably think that we are called to witness only to the lost. But NO, God used "Joe Bob" to witness to ME! He showed me that if you are firm in God's calling on your life, and seek guidance from His word...God can use you no matter what you have been through.

In fact, this life is not at all about what we go though...but how willing we are to be used by God. He requires something of each of us. Just like in the story of Abraham, God does not always require we give it up, He just wants to know we are willing!

Are you willing? Are you Surrendered?

Although I am sure of my eternal destination, I am still working out my own salvation in the area of surrender?

What is God asking of you today??